A Tale of Two Car Buyers: Some Things Never Change!

Auto writers, journalists, commentators and pundits are often subjected to inquisitions from relatives, friends, neighbors and colleagues outside the automotive world:

Questions include: What do you like best? What should I buy? What would you buy? Why that? How much should I pay? It’s not a clunker now what? Is it really safe? But it’s so ugly – looks like a bread box.”

And the “cash for clunkers” program, the economy and a shortage of ‘desirable’ cars have exacerbated the questions.

But what happens when it’s your wife who is thinking about buying a new car? Especially when she has always done shopping on her own, cut her deals, paid for it with her money, favors a specific brand, likes a specific style, thinks the entire process is a nasty game and the buyer never wins, most salespeople are either disinterested or too pushy, the entire process is fraught with a lack of full disclosure and it contributes to a daily “CBH” – car buying headache.

What if it’s the new wife of one of my oldest and best friends, who, aided by her new spouse with his own rather odd set of automotive buying considerations and values? Considerations that are far different than the new bride’s who buys only “cute little cars in pretty colors that make her smile.” But she also gets a CBH and CMS (car marketing stress) after walking out of every store. Her husband however goes ballistic at the process and demands to speak to the oldest salesman on the floor or walks out. Then calls me. You see the newlyweds live in Texas.

It’s a helluva conundrum and it’s been going on for a couple of weeks. Over the breakfast, lunch or dinner table with my wife and countless cell phone calls from my friend and/or his wife as they enter or leave a dealers showroom.  Is two weeks the gestation period of new car buying? Must be.

My wife’s decision to consider a new car was prompted by the service manager of a dealership literally saying, “It’s time. Your car is on a life support and I can’t tell you how much long it’ll last.” Sad news after 150,000+ miles of faithful service, but it was the push to end procrastination she needed and ruefully decided to go car shopping.

Free Test Drive!

Contrast this to my friend who thought his wife’s six year old car, while small, cute and “does bring a smile to her face,” was too damn small for the crazed nuts driving those big trucks and SUVs on the nasty freeways of Houston. “It can’t be really safe,” was his comment. His wife, however, was not going car shopping.  Her car was just fine, thank you and only had 40,000 miles.  It took some convincing, but the newlyweds spent two weekends car shopping.

There was an odd echo chamber in my head as first my wife told me what she didn’t like about looking for a new car and then my friend or his wife would call with another negative comment or request for advice, information or counsel.

Here are a few quotable quotations, which will provide insight:

• “If the car business is so bad, why did I have to wait for 10 minutes before a salesperson asked if he could help?”
• “Why do they ask you to sit down at a desk before asking what I’d like to see?”
• “Shouldn’t the salesperson have real knowledge about the car without having to look it up or guess?”
• “I told him I wanted something small, but he pushed a bigger model!”
• “He never asked qualifying and need questions, that’s dumb isn’t it?”
• “Don’t they ever write something down so you refer to it for comparison of facts and pricing?”

And my personal favorite,

• “That’s the best I can do except if you’re prepared to buy it now!”

My wife who had made up her mind as to make, model, color and price, finally asked if would I come with her.  “Certainly,” I said, “But do me favor on the way to that store, please take a test drive in such-and-such.”  Okay was the begrudging response, and off we went.

At the just-try-it-for-me dealership, after looking around for the model on the floor (which wasn’t there – it’s a big clunker seller), a bright, personable woman approached us, stuck out her hand and said, “Hello, I’m blah blah, do you have a specific model in mind? Are you looking for a new car, used or certified pre-owned? We have some of each. Have you ever driven a so and so? Would you like to? What do you need to know?”  All in an agreeable, I’m just here to help way.

There was an immediate sense of ease and understanding, After two test drives and some discussion, a decision was made and the deal cut, papers filled and off we went. I asked if she really liked the car. Her response, “Yes, I like it.”  Whew.

The ex-bachelor called to say his new bride had picked a such and such, especially on my recommendation and that he had negotiated what seemed like a good deal, but would I talk to her? Sure.

“Maaarty, it’s not as cute as mine but it’s bigger and more comfortable. Can I live with cloth seats not leather? What do you think about the color for Houston? And thank-yew for all your help.”

Bottom line? Both bought the same make, model and color but for totally different reasons and prices. Isn’t the car business great?

Used Car Salesmen Never Die, They Just Change

In this week’s Q&A with Stuart Elliot, the advertising columnist of the New York Times and a former columnist for the Detroit Free Press, a reader wrote in who wanted to know if the animated character, Mr. Opportunity, Honda uses in its semi-annual car sales had changed its look?

Here’s the question and Elliot’s response:

Q & A with Stuart Elliott

Q: (Reader) Is it just me, or has Honda ’s Mr. Opportunity changed his look a bit? Different animator? (I must say, I like the old one better. This one has strange shading.)

A: (Stuart Elliott) The question refers to a character that appears in the year-end model clearance advertising that runs around this time each year in advertising for the American Honda Motor Company unit of the Honda Motor of Japan. The retail-oriented ads are created by the longtime American Honda agency, RPA in Santa Monica, California.

“There have been subtle changes to Mr. Opportunity over the past six years,” Christina Ra, a spokeswoman for American Honda in Torrance, Calif., writes in an e-mail message.

“Over time, we re-evaluate his attitude, demeanor, what he says, where he is,” Ms. Ra says, “all to reflect the times and also be reflective of consumer attitudes.”

For example, “he was once flippant and made a lot of jokes,” she adds, “but he was softened up a bit now.”

“Most recently, Honda wanted to make him more real,” Mr. Ra says, adding that “he’s not interacting with other individuals now” and the car on sale in each ad is “highlighted more than he is.”

“The backgrounds are more simple, the surroundings have evolved,” she adds. “Perhaps the softened demeanor and changing surroundings have impacted the ‘way he looks’?”

“The animator has remained the same,” Ms. Ra says, and there have been “no intentional changes to Mr. Opportunity himself along the lines of shading and such — not even a haircut!”

Those with long memories may recall when Mr. Opportunity wore a trench coat. The garment was removed from his wardrobe, according to Ms. Ra, after the trench coat began to represent “something negative relative to current events” because of references to a so-called trench coat Mafia in connection with the Columbine massacre.

Some people just watch too much television, don’t they?

The Goods: Live Hard * Sell Hard: Will This Be the Worst Movie of the Year?

Worst movie of the year?

The retail automobile business, especially car sales personnel, has been vilified and maligned for decades.  And now, just when the car business needs good news comes what appears to be the worst movie of the year.

The movie, “The Goods: Live Hard * Sell Hard” stars Jeremy Piven  (main character Don Ready) the Emmy award winning snarky, foul mouth agent in Entourage patterned after Rahn Emanuel’s Hollywood’s super agent brother.  Among other starring roles is James Brolin, of past television fame, now best known as the father of Josh Brolin and the husband of Barbara Streisand.

The plot as describe in a puffy news release,  “When he’s (Piven’s character Don Ready) asked to help save an ailing local car dealership from bankruptcy, Ready and his ragtag crew descend on the town of Temecula like a pack of coyotes on a basket full of burgers. Selling, drinking, selling and going to strip clubs is their stock and trade. And they do it well. What Don doesn’t expect is to fall in love and find his soul.

The movie is the first production from Will Ferrell and Adam McKays Gary Sanchez productions, the guys who made the wonderful Talledaga Nites and Step Brothers. It was directed by Neal Brennan, creator of Comedy Central hit, “Chappelle’s Show.”

There are two web sites listed to get a sneak preview of the movie opening this week. The first is the PG rated trailer, the second is XX rated, so be warned of risqué dialog and graphic stupidity, but if you insist click here.

It’s the Pebble Beach Weekend Gala

Thousands of automobile aficionados,  car enthusiasts, racing fans, automobile manufacturers, purveyors of auto memorabilia and ephemera, classic vehicle auctions  as well as many media types will gather this weekend for the annual pilgrimage  to  the semi-hallowed ground of California’s gorgeous Monterey Peninsula for arguably the best auto show in the world, the Pebble Beach Concours  d’Elegance.

Pebble, as it’s called, is also the venue for luxury and exotic car brands who are presenting new models to those with discriminating eyes and high discretionary incomes.

Did I happen to mention this event is not for the feint of heart or shallow pockets. Hotels 100 miles away are fully booked at least double, usually triple standard rates with a minimum of a four-night stay, please pay in advance.

Tickets for Sunday’s day long gala and exotic and rare car judging events were $150 each if purchased in advance, $175 each on Sunday, the 16th. Parking? It’s scarce, miles away but included in the admission ticket. That’s Pebble, and is that nice.