Have you had a Tow-Mater in your garage? Or perhaps a Jack o' Lantern of Love?
My first car was named Smedley, a less than creative concoction for a beat-up old Chevy that carried a New Jersey license plate beginning with “SMD.” Actually, the ’64 Bel Air had a lot of names we won’t use here, most created on the spot when it wouldn’t start, which was quite often.
Most of my friends have also given names to their cars. There’s something about personalizing the relationship with something you spend so much time with. A friend, having loaded up his new chariot with every possible mobile electronic device, settled on the somewhat disturbing “Hal,” and routinely would hit the voice-control button, asking to “Open the pod bay doors, Hal.” Sadly, the usual response is, “Command not recognized,” though it occasionally results in the system changing the satellite radio channel.
Americans, it seems, aren’t the only ones in the habit of naming inanimate (okay, semi-animate) machines. A new survey by the British parking lot operator NCP found that at least half of all English motorists personalize their vehicle with a friendly moniker.
Celebrities and royalty are the overwhelming favorite choices, with Prince William and Lady Gaga among the top choices right now. Also high on the list: cartoon characters, sports stars and politicians. (What sort of car would be honored as Maggie Thatcher or, perhaps, the former Prime Minister’s more fitting nickname, the Iron Lady?)
According to the survey, 3% of Brits name their cars after co-workers – which might seem reason to bash the headlights into a wall, perhaps.
A full 20% of the respondents admitted being too embarrassed to even disclose the nicknames they used.
And another 20% said they considered the idea of naming a car a bit “sad.”
But, let’s face it, automobiles really do LOOK a bit like people. When Lexus, Ford and Chevrolet recently introduced new design strategies, executives from all three makers referred to the “face” of their new products. The headlights, grille and bumper make it easy to anthropomorphize most models.
“We have found that people are more likely to anthropomorphize when we make things unpredictable or when we make people feel socially isolated,” Dr. John Cacioppo, a leading expert on the inclination to attribute humanlike characteristics and emotions, tells the Detroit News.
Here in the States, there’ve been a variety of surveys about car nicknames, and the site Namely-Yours.com found that its readers had a few particular patterns for picking a name.
Most common? Naming a car because of its color, like Baby Blue, Red Rover, the Pickle or the Jack ‘o Lantern of Love.
Next on the list: a familiar name – Betsy being the most popular, the study found, along with Veronica, (hmmm, where’s Archie?), and Wilma.
Others like to name their cars to reflect the vehicle’s physical appearances. There’s Fat Car for the long-wheelbase van, War Wagon for the ’73 Charger, and Clown Car for the VW Beetle that the owner liked to cram all his friends inside.
Which reminds me of another model I purchased after finishing college and barely having enough money for gas. It quickly was nicknamed Dimples, and I bought it for next to nothing. You can probably guess why.